PERCEIVED FAILURE
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

PERCEIVED FAILURE

I wish I could say I didn’t struggle with guilt, that the fact that I made a ‘decision’ was enough to remove any self-accusation, but I did and it wasn’t.

I felt like a complete failure.

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YOU’LL MISS THIS
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

YOU’LL MISS THIS

You’ll miss this someday.

It was my mantra when parenting times were tough, my self-encouragement when it all seemed too difficult too busy, too overwhelming. But now I’m wondering…do we have to think we’ll miss every moment?

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WHO WILL WATER?
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

WHO WILL WATER?

There is a question all parents long to ask the world: Will you water the seeds?

The seeds we’ve planted in the garden of our children’s hearts. Seeds of identity, value, belonging and worth. Will you water them?

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SITTING WITH TEARS
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

SITTING WITH TEARS

He left for college just weeks ago. My first born, my son, the one whose presence fills a room.

I expected the sadness, but I did not expect to feel lost.

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UNDYING LOVE
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

UNDYING LOVE

Deep into the late stages of Alzheimer’s disease, he no longer recognizes his wife of 55 years. And yet, she refuses to turn off her love. 

Superwoman is real. 

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HELD BELIEFS
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

HELD BELIEFS

Our mind is on constant guard against that which would challenge our held beliefs. We see what we want to see, and in self-protection reject that which contradicts.

But is it possible to hold to our compass while creating room for course correction?

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RISK GOING FAR
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

RISK GOING FAR

There was a truth behind my eyes that I would not find words to share.

He asked if I was afraid he would get hurt. Yes, my heart thought, but it’s not the physical pain I fear. 

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WHEN HURT RETURNS
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

WHEN HURT RETURNS

I was once again staring deep into an old wound caused by another’s bad behavior. The anger returned. The confusion soon followed.

And then guilt. Massive, MASSIVE amounts of guilt.

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SAYING GOODBYE
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

SAYING GOODBYE

In this next season, to love will be to let go. I will miss their faces, miss their hugs, miss what I know of being a mom.

I will miss the pieces of my heart that go with them.

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THOSE WHO DO
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

THOSE WHO DO

We all lead, we all serve, we all have eyes looking to us for guidance and direction. Whether in little ways or from a big stage, we all long to make a difference in our world. 

It’s time we stop waiting for others to empower the greatness we already carry.

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ANNIVERSARY THANKS
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

ANNIVERSARY THANKS

I thought I’d know more by now, thought I’d have more figured out. But yet the journey continues as I hold to one truth - superwoman is still real.

Superwoman is still you.

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THE DANGER of SUCCESS
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

THE DANGER of SUCCESS

Losing sight of our intrinsic value is dangerous, comparison absolutely lethal. Our identity is our most precious commodity, but it is often under attack - not just from outside, but from within.

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THE FAILURE LIE
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

THE FAILURE LIE

I watched as the photos flashed across my screen, eighteen years of my son’s life passing quickly with each upload. The memories swelled, but so did a realization.

I often felt like I was failing. Looking back I can see that was entirely untrue.

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BEAUTIFUL MESS
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

BEAUTIFUL MESS

When I turn again they are not so much piles of mess as they are mountains of evidence of a life lived well. Testaments to the beauty of a place where four humans unite.

No, there is not calm in my house, but there is life.

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RETURN to NEED
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

RETURN to NEED

Strength and weakness. Success and failure. Abundance and need. Not one alone defines. Instead, can all be given their space to live and breathe within the life of a genuine super woman?

I hope so.

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GOODBYE to the GOOD
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

GOODBYE to the GOOD

In the garden of our lives the draw toward growing everything is everywhere. Do more, accomplish more, be more to more people.

But at this pace and with this much crowding, do any of our flowers have a chance to grow?

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BORN for CONNECTION
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

BORN for CONNECTION

Humanity is not lost, I thought to myself, we are still driven by love.

Still driven by relationship, still driven by connection, still driven by belonging. 

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BORN for FLIGHT
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

BORN for FLIGHT

We have wings yet choose not to fly. Built to dream yet bottled by reality. Made for ‘more’ and yet sometimes self-contained to ‘less.’

What convinces us that we are not worthy of the air? 

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UNSEEN ONES
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

UNSEEN ONES

We are all the unseen ones, but the truth is that we don’t have to be. May we be brave enough to step out from behind our walls.

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STRENGTH in MOURNING
Kiesha Brainard Kiesha Brainard

STRENGTH in MOURNING

I can still remember the ultrasound technician’s face as he relayed the news - there is no heartbeat. Four days later I delivered my daughter and said goodbye to the one that was to make me a mom.

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